


The One That Got Away - A Nishinoya Yuu x Male Reader Story

by HoshidaYuujin



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Death, Fanfiction, M/M, MALE READER INSERT, Male Friendship, Originally Posted Elsewhere, POV Male Character, Reader-Insert, Regret, Shounen-ai, Slice of Life
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-04
Updated: 2019-01-25
Packaged: 2019-07-24 16:02:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death, Underage
Chapters: 5
Words: 13,078
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16178450
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/HoshidaYuujin/pseuds/HoshidaYuujin
Summary: This is a story set before the actual Haikyuu! Timeline.It was generally known that Nishinoya Yuu didn't want to return to the club because of their ace. But, there was actually more to that. What made Yuu, who loves volleyball more than any other sport, to put it aside for quite some time?Disclaimer: I do not own Haikyuu!! It belongs to its rightful owners.





	1. Chapter 1

* * *

Have you ever wondered why Nishinoya Yuu was fixated on  _not_  returning to the Karasuno Men’s Volleyball Club?

Was it because of Azumane Asahi?

Well, there’s that.

But that’s more to that. 

.....

In the event that Asahi would return to the team, 

_In the seemingly possible event_

He would be reminded.

That once in his life, he had a friend.

That he left to die.

* * *

“It’s gotten worse, Naomi-chan.”

Mishima Naomi almost flipped her office desk in complete shock as a college friend called her on her private line while in the middle of work. If it was an ordinary call, she’d just press the stress-relieving reject button and hope that the caller got the idea. But she knew the number. That one number that called her last time her son got admitted due to overfatigue, the _one number_  that made her rush through traffic and leave her mountain of paperwork – the telephone number of the hospital her friend’s working in.

Though that said, how could it immediately be bad news anyway? What if her husband just miraculously gave birth to their second child without her knowing that he was actually pregnant for the past 8-9 months?

Nah.

That’s impossible.

How any woman can wish for such to be a reality.

But, alas.

She knew that it’s as close as the possibility of her jumping over the moon.

_Never._

Then that means...

…..

Unfortunately,

She was right.

As soon as she followed her college friend enter a certain hospital room, the first bed had her own son sleeping on it. Her doctor friend said that the child was just exhausted and was taking a well-deserved rest.

Beside her son was someone she knew quite well. 

That energetic ball of sunshine that just went to school together with her son earlier that day; that one teen that would normally enter her son’s room through the window on the second floor of the Mishima family’s humble abode; that first-year student at Karasuno High School who currently sat on a stool beside her son, seemingly out of character as he had his head down – Nishinoya Yuu.

“Nishinoya-san.” The doctor friend of Naomi spoke amidst the cold air.

The libero obviously flinched but still slowly turned around to see his friend’s recently arrived mother.

She knew Mishima Naomi enough that it’ll be suicide to even dare cross her path. But this was much worse than threading against the road she’s walking on – her beloved [Male Name] just got his legs broken.  _Again_.

And this time, he was supposed to prevent it from happening again.

He  _promised_.

“M-Mishima-san” 

_Don’t I dare look at her face._

_Never._

“Yuu-kun.”

There it was. Naomi-san’s cold, nerve-wracking, monotonous voice. The voice that could freeze an entire lake with just one word. The voice that can turn lions to run away with their tails between their legs.

Oh, how he wished to have it not directed upon him.

But. No.

It was.

“Yuu-kun.” The repeat of his name just made the hairs on his arms stand in fright.

Naomi’s voice was just that scary.

“Y-Yes...” He can’t look at her. He just can’t.

With a soft ‘I’ll be outside’ from the doctor, Naomi then began throwing questions.

“Can you tell me what happened?”

Though it may be a mere question, Yuu found it to be outright horrifying. One or two lumps in his throat keep getting in his way. He just can’t immediately answer without worrying that he’ll end up wetting his pants.

“'[M-Male Name] jumped too high a-and...” He turned his face towards the wall beside him, completely avoiding the elder’s eyes. “E-Ended up falling down the stairs.” 

He has to keep his tears inside of him. 

He can’t stop once he starts bawling, after all.

“All because he wanted to catch a volleyball, correct?”

“Y-Yes.”

“That  _who_  threw?” 

“I-I did.”

Guilty.

Though not looking at her, Yuu could still feel the woman’s stare, a stare full of sadness, of anger, of  _disappointment_.

As Naomi released a deep sigh, she directed her stares to her slumbering child.

The kid’s legs were currently wrapped in layers of bandages, same with his arms. Though a green sheet of blanket covered his body from the neck down, it wasn’t long enough to hide the entire length of the male’s legs. A slight bruise travelled around the teen’s face, marking his once semi-flawless features. His neck was also wrapped with the white stuff. 

Seeing the damage herself, she didn’t know where to start.

“I-Im so sorry!” Yuu shifted towards the mother and yelled his apology, his head hanging down in shame. No other patients were in the ward – which was a good thing. 

“I’m so sorry, Mishima-san! Because of my carelessness, my complete disregard to the area, that [Male Name]’s currently here again!” 

He didn’t stutter.  _Yet._

“I’m so sorry that you have to see your son lying here inside the hospital again less than a year after the first time! And even when I promised to make sure he won’t get injured again... I... I...”

There’s the stuttering.

From that point on, river of tears started flowing down the first year’s face, every drop landing onto the marble flooring of the room. Naomi came to see Yuu’s face getting overwhelmed by tears and snot. As the libero had his orbs opened slightly, the mother grabbed the opportunity to take a closer look at the neighbour.  

 _He’s been crying non-stop, hasn’t he?_ She thought as her eyes landed on the puffy red pair of eyes in front of her. 

Yuu’s continuous sniffles filled the room. Every time he wanted to continue, he just can’t form words quick enough and ends up bawling some more. 

“Yuu-kun...” The male-in-question had his teeth and fists clenched in deep guilt.

“I-I’ll accept any punishment you give me. I deserve it. B-But don’t take [Male Name] away from here. P-Please....” The boy’s fists were balled too tight, his nails were digging deeper into his skin.

“Why?”

“B-Because...” Yuu can’t think of an answer.

Should he tell her that the Volleyball Club needs him?

That’s being selfish.

Should he tell her that his friends will miss him?

Yuu’s probably the only  _actual_  friend [Male Name] has, well, besides a certain raven-haired manager. The boy’s too timid for his own good, and the fully charged libero’s the only one who’d stay by him despite that thus far. Not only that, the slumbering teen has some trust issues. No one other than that one certain person, Noya, and their immediate family members can get past that. Even them, they barely crossed over the ‘[Male Name] Wall’, truth be told.

So, what should he say to the waiting Mishima Naomi?

“I... I...”

Sensing the kid can’t think straight at the moment due to fear and guilt, Naomi released another deep sigh. Closing in into the crying neighbour, she raised her right hand and ruffled the teen’s mess of a hair.

“Don’t worry. I won’t think of doing that. Do you know how lively he gets every time he tells us about your practices and usual sleep-overs? It’ll make him gloomier than he already is if I transfer him somewhere else.”

“M-Mishima-san...” Yuu still had his head down, though the tears started slowing down, him getting composed and all.

“I’m sad to say this, but you know [Male Name] more than we do, Yuu-kun. And because of that, you’re probably his only friend in school, not counting Kiyoko-chan.”

_Bull’s eye._

“But you didn’t leave him. You stayed with him. From elementary until now that you two are in Karasuno High. Even if you guys went to separate Middle Schools, you still got in touch with each other.”

“I-I’m sorry. I’m really sorry.”

“I’m sure you didn’t do this on purpose. And I know [Male Name] knows that, too. But...” She turned her head towards the sleeping [Male Name].

“It’s not me whom you should be apologising to. It’s supposed to be [Male Name]. Isn’t that right?”

“I-I suppose.” The tears have finally stopped coming. All that’s left is Yuu’s sniffling.

“Well then, I’ll take care of things from here. You better go home now. Don’t you have volleyball practice to attend to?”

“Y-Yes.” 

With that, the libero stood up from his seat and picked his bag placed behind him. After quickly adjusting it to his small frame, he first uttered a soft ‘Goodbye’ to his friend before doing the same to the mother.

And thus, he left.

* * *

The moment he knew [Male Name] has woken up the day after his accident, Noya immediately rushed in and cried a waterfall of tears while apologising. As the usually active libero kept his head down, trying to muster the courage of accepting his friend’s wrath, Yuu instead received a lively laughter as a reply.

“Wha, What’s so funny?”

“Y-Your face! It’s so funny! Do you think I cannot laugh seeing that ridiculous of a face you got there? There’s snot all over you!”

“H-Hey! I’m being serious here, you know!”

“Sorry, sorry.” [Male Name] tried to calm down, preventing himself to laugh some more despite directly seeing his neighbour’s disaster of a face.

“A-Aren’t you mad?” Yuu slightly bit his lip in fear. 

“Why would I? Did you do it on purpose?”

“N-No! Why would I?”

“Then, it’s all good.”

Yuu can’t believe his eyes. Despite the damage he caused, [Male Name] just smiled at him, a close-eyed one, as if nothing’s wrong.

He can’t take it.

Getting away with his sin that easily, he didn’t feel good about it.

Not one bit.

Due to the damage, [Male Name]’s legs were placed in a cast. For eight to nine weeks, the teen with [Hair Colour] hair rested inside his hospital room. During those times, Yuu still visited him, sometimes along with the other Volleyball Club members. The soon-to-be Papa and Mama Crows always asked him if he were okay or if he got lonely. The injured one replied instantly with a 'Why would I be? You guys visit me, after all,’ followed up with a toothy grin. Tanaka and Asahi asked the teammate what the latter wanted from the vending machine outside the room and later on bought it for him. Chikara told [Male Name] about the lessons he missed together with Kazuhito and Hisashi, considering Yuu’s and Ryuunosuke’s uselessness on the subject.

Those days continued, though some visited less and less, considering the upcoming competitions. In the end, only Yuu was left.

That is, until Karasuno lost to Dateko later that year.


	2. Chapter 2

* * *

**_First Week of School; Sugawara and Daichi are third years_ **

**_Third Person Point of View_ **

* * *

“Kiyoko-san.” 

On her way inside the main school building, the bespectacled beauty of the Men’s Volleyball Club turned her heels around when a certain ashen haired setter called her name. Turning around with a sealed box on her hands, she was met by none other than Sugawara Koushi. 

“Did he ask you to prepare one?” 

“Yes.” She slightly raised the small box for emphasis. 

With his left hand resting on his hip, Koushi took a deep breath and released an inaudible sigh.  

“He really can’t move on, huh?” 

“It hasn’t been that long. You should give him more time.” 

“I know that.” Koushi replied with his head turned to the ceiling, his right hand hung loose on the side. “We really can’t do anything right now.” 

“Yes. Though, I believe what we  _can_ do is to support him.” 

“You got that right.” An approaching Papa Crow got the attention of his Mama counterpart and their club manager. 

“I suppose so.”  

* * *

**_Earlier_ ** **_that_ ** **_Same Year_ **

* * *

“Is that so...” 

“Yes, it is, [Male Name]. It really crushed their spirits.” 

“Well, that’s volleyball, right? You win some, you lose some. And if someone wins, surely, there are not.” 

Shimizu Kiyoko arrived at her cousin’s hospital room a few hours after their Men’s Volleyball Club lost to the Iron Wall of Date. [Male Name] was still laying on his bed, his legs restricted by the concrete enveloping them. Though that said, it didn’t stop him and his cousin to converse with the recent events. With his eyes looking straight towards the opposite wall, the frown that ran across [Male Name]’s face only deepened. 

“Even if I was there, I wouldn’t have made any difference, anyway. I mean, I’m not as good or athletic as anyone of them. I’m not as devoted to the sport as Noya nor Tanaka-san. Certainly, I don’t have any skills that can help them, unlike Daichi-san or Sugawara-san. 

“[Male Name]...”  

“All I’m good at is dragging everyone down to my level. I mean, let’s face it. That’s what I’ve been doing all this time.” The [Hair Colour]-haired teen lowered his gaze to the two fists resting on top of his lap, [Hair Colour] locks shadowing over his eyes. Tightening his hands, he softly let out a light sigh. 

“[Male Name], that’s not–“ 

“You don’t need to say anything, Kiyo-chan. I have told you this once and I don’t mind repeating it again. I know my worth, and it’s far from reaching you guys’ standards.” The injured player let a wry smile grace his features, his eyes half-lid. 

“[Male Name], why do you keep–“ 

A sudden outburst of a loud pop song cut Kiyoko off. Apparently, it’s her emergency ringtone. With a quick tug, she pulled the noisy device from the pocket of her skirt and pressed the green button. 

“Excuse me, [Male Name].” She slowly bowed to her cousin before going out of the room. 

[Male Name] may be a jolly, cheerful person, but that was just the player’s facade. Deep down, he feels he’s the loneliest member in the Volleyball Club – something that Yuu wanted to dispel ever since they were little. In crowds, he’d wear a happy face, but when alone, he’d keep a shut mouth and probably sit in a corner, play with his fingers while hanging his head low and humming to himself.  

So, how come  _this_  happened? 

Let’s just say [Male Name]’s environment wasn’t the best one. 

His surroundings had those  _things_ not suitable for impressionable young minds. 

Move here, move there. 

And when  _they_ got tired of him,  _they_  would leave him, returning him back from whence he came. 

That is, until Mishima Harumide and Mishima Naomi came along. 

And adopted him. 

Yup, [Male Name] was actually, an orphan, left behind by his biological parents due to big debts and personal luxuries.  

Sounds a bit similar to those one would see or read in soap operas, movies, or certain written literature, but it  _does_ happen in reality... 

… and not  _everyone_ ends up lucky in the end – getting adopted by caring and loving people. 

[Male Name] was initially one of the unlucky ones. Now that he was found by the Mishima family, one would think he should now have felt the sense of being secured and loved. 

 _Wrong_. 

True that the couple showered the teen with [Hair Colour] hair with love and affection – but not to the point of turning the child into a spoiled brat, but things done are things done. What happened in his past cannot be ripped out of him. It has become a part of him, wherever he may go. It has warped his personality, seeding it with doubts and uncertainty towards people and himself. 

 _No matter how you fix a mirror,_ _cracks can’t be removed._  

Thus, explaining the guy’s trust issues. 

Now back to the matter at hand. 

As Kiyoko, Naomi’s biological niece, returned from her phone call, she immediately said sorry to her cousin as she could not attend to him more than expected – something came up at her own home. [Male Name] understood, gave her a soft smile, and  _kicked_  her out of the room. 

As the days progressed, his legs were finally getting well. Though, he’d need to do a little rehab before finally leaving the hospital, he had other matters to attend to – studying. 

Since he got hospitalised, he had to double his effort in catching up with the lessons. Initially, it was Chikara who would help him with them, but then because of their practices, he had visited less and less until he never came back. He thought of asking Noya for help. But, then again, not only he’s not of a great help with this kind of thing, something which [Male Name] knew quite well, the libero hasn’t been visiting the patient for quite a while. So, [Male Name]’s dear cousin took the initiative and would ask hand-outs from his teachers. They were kind enough to help the lass. 

His grades in the latest exams were average, all never went lower than 80, especially PE which is was a bit higher than the others. But due to the hospitalisation, his fear of earning grades lower than 75 – his personal cut-off, might actually come true. Thus, the studying. 

Every once in a while, he would scavenge for his notes and received hand-outs from his school bag placed beside the bed. He would first start with his least favourite one before choosing anything else besides Japanese – the one he considers the easiest. 

His logic, study the disliked subjects first and motivate yourself in finishing it. That way, once the most favourite subject comes, there would be no pressure. 

One day, while destroying his brain cells with his Science lessons, a knock came to his door. Granting the person permission, the door gave way to a raven-haired upperclassman. And no, it wasn’t Kiyoko. It was Sawamura Daichi. 

“S-Sawamura-san...” [Male Name] forgot to hide his shock. “W-What are you doing here?” 

“Why do I feel like you didn’t want me to be here?” Daichi joked. 

“N-No! That’s not it,” the patient panicked.  

“I guess I’ll just be on my way then,” Daichi turned around against [Male Name], raising a white folder he held. “But what should I do with these hand-outs, I wonder?” 

“H-Hand-outs?” 

“Yes. Hand-outs. Right after I took my time to come here, I wonder what’ll I with these. I guess I’ll just burn them– ” A smug on his face was apparent. 

“Okay, okay! I GET IT!” Shouted the obviously frantic [Male Name]. 

* * *

“T-They did??” 

“Yes,” nodded the future captain. 

“So that’s why...” 

The moment Daichi handed over the white folder full of hand-outs to [Male Name], the future captain’s first question was if Noya has been visiting lately. Hearing a faint 'No, he hasn’t' from the [Hair Colour]-haired teen, the raven-haired player told [Male Name] everything – from their defeat against Dateko,  from the point of view of one of the actual players, to Yuu and Asahi’s fight, to the libero’s suspension. 

 _Of course,_ _Yuu_ _won’t be able to visit me. He’s busy with A_ _sahi_ _-san_ , [Male Name] thought to himself. 

“By the time the suspension’s over, you’re already back, right?” 

“Y-Yes. In fact, come Friday, I can take the exams together with you guys. Just somewhere else, as per the Principal’s conditions.” 

“In the school clinic?” [Male Name] nodded. 

“I really wanted to see the cast removed, but then it was the day after we lost so...” 

Daichi received a seemingly heartily laugh from the underclassman. “You really wanted to see things broken, huh, Sawamura-san.” 

“W-When you say it that way, it sounds like...” Daichi frantically waved his hands in front of [Male Name], wanting to correct the assumed misunderstanding.  

“I don’t mind, Sawamura-san. Hahaha!” The patient said nonchalantly. 

 _Sorry,_ _Sawamura_ _-san. I think you’re too late already._  

 _I_ _’m sorry._  

* * *

It was Monday when Daichi last visited. As per the request of the [Hair Colour]-haired one, Daichi kept the underclassman’s current condition and sooner return to Karasuno High all to himself. 

The next day, [Male Name] continued with his rehabilitation with the aid of his foster father, Harumide, who immediately pinched [Male Name]’s nose once the other slipped 'Harumide-san' instead of the constantly proposed ‘Tou-chan’. 

Nice enough, the stability of his legs finally returned, delighting the athlete. There must have been some good amount of determination on the boy’s part if he was able to stabilise his legs earlier than predicted – even if he doesn’t actually show it. 

A few days after came Friday – exams. [Male Name] was more than ready, though he still took his tests at the nurse’s office. He didn’t mind. In fact, he thought it was for the best. He wasn’t ready to face Yuu, after [Male Name] heard what happened between their libero and their ace. 

Heading straight to the nurse’s office, [Male Name] took every precaution he could think off to make sure he won’t bump into Yuu – checking the corridors before proceeding, heightening his sense of hearing in case the libero’s voice was within range, and looking at the reflections on nearby windows to check if the friend was around. Luckily, he hadn’t seen the slightly shorter friend. 

“Good morning, Mishima-san,” the nurse seated on her chair greeted him upon entering the room. 

As soon the greetings exchanged, [Male Name] proceeded to the nurse’s table where his test papers were waiting for him. When the bell finally rang, the lady in the white coat handed him his first exam – Japanese. A black pen in his dominant hand, he then started answering. 

Once one bell rang, he handed his finished or unfinished paper to the nurse, immediately receiving the next set of exams right after. [Male Name] would take a few minutes to rest during every exam, massaging his temples and the bridge of his nose, right before answering again. This continued for hours until lunchtime. After handing over his last exam before lunch – Math, a smile from the nurse was thrown at him.   

“Ready to have your lunch, Mishima-san?” Asked the nurse. 

“Uh... Yes,” replied [Male Name], his smile not faltering. 

“Okay, so, I’ll take my leave first. I’ll hand these papers to your adviser,” raising her left hand which contained the folder of [Male Name]’s answered exams, “and then eat my lunch. You can eat yours here if you want.” The nurse smiled as she turned her body and headed to the door. 

“Thanks for the offer, Sensei,” the nurse nodded in content as she closed the sliding door of the room. 

Out of his backpack, [Male Name] took out his bento, prepared by himself since both Harumide and Naomi left early that day, though it was Naomi who cooked the food.  

“Well, Itadakimasu.” 

* * *

The afternoon exams weren’t any different. [Male Name] took his exams at the nurse’s office. It started with Literature and ended with History. As the final bell rang, the teen with [Hair Colour] hair handed over his test paper with confidence, since he didn’t have any question unanswered.  

Fixing himself and his bag for a few minutes, he then said a soft ‘Goodbye’ to the nurse and headed out of the room. With one direction in mind, a happy smile graced his features.  

“I don’t think I’d mind seeing Yuu-chan now.” 

“I’m feeling great.”  


	3. Chapter 3

* * *

**_Afternoon of Examination Day,_** **_Nishinoya_ ** **_is first year_ **

**_NIshinoya’s_ ** **_Point of View_ **

* * *

“Phew! Finally!” 

As the teacher finally exited the room, I began screaming in joy, arms flailing and feet stretched to the side every time I jumped. 

 _Hell is finally d_ _ealt with_ _!_  

 _I can worry about my grades some other time, but right now,_  

 _I_ _rejoice_ _!_  

After my sudden outburst, I reached for my bag and marched out of the room, but before I can even reach for the door, I noticed some of my classmates forming a circle with their seats. It got me curious, so I approached one of them who held a few draw sticks on his hand. 

“What are you guys doing?” 

“Yo, Noya!” Araki turned himself around to face me, his shoulder resting on the back of the seat. 

“We’re continuing the King Game we had last night.” Said Suzaku, the one holding the draw sticks.  

“King Game? But why here? And now?” 

“We really want to give everyone the chance of being the king. That, and we won’t be able to have free time for a while after this. Some of us have part-time jobs, after all,” replied Niko who whispered the last part. “You’re still suspended from sports activities, right? Relax for a while. Join us. We don’t mind.” 

“Thanks for the offer guys, but, I think I’ll head home and take a break. My head’s throbbing from too much information,” I reasoned.  

 _It’s not that I don’t want to play._  

 _I’m just too tired right now._  

 _I think I’ll_ _be able to_ _sleep peacefully like a log later._  

“Okay,” said Niko. “That exam  _was_  a pain in the neck. See you next week then, Noya-san.” She chirped as their game slowly commenced.  

On the other hand, I decided to leave them be and left the room through the nearest exit. On my way out of the school, I saw Ennoshita-san and said my hellos before walking out the gate. 

Little did I know, [Male Name] was actually at school that day. 

Looking for me.   

* * *

 ** _Third Person Point of View_**  

* * *

By the time [Male Name] arrived at the classroom, there were only five people left, all were quite busy playing. 

“Oh my!” Said Suzaku who was facing directly at the door where the volleyball player entered from. “[Male Name]! You’re back!” The others then quickly turned around towards the named teen while [Male Name], on the other hand, flinched at the sudden attention. 

“Y-Yes. I took the exam at the clinic,” [Male Name] took a few steps into the classroom. As the lad slowly approached the playing classmates, the other door at the back of the room slid open, a certain Ennoshita Chikara entering from the hallway.  

“[M-Male Name]-kun!” He, too, was surprised. “You’re already out of the hospital!” 

“Y-Yes, Ennoshita-san,” [Male Name] replied gently. “The doctors finally allowed me to leave the hospital.” 

“T-That’s great!” The other athlete walked to the teammate. “So, can you play volleyball again?” 

“The doctor and Naomi-san said that I should rest for at least a month first before doing something strenuous. The healed cracks may suddenly open up, they warned me.” 

“Is that so…” Ennoshita trailed off.  

Not a moment sooner, a certain ashen-haired setter entered the room through the front door. Eyeing two of his juniors right off the bat, Sugawara called for their attention. 

“[Male Name]! Ennoshita-kun!” 

This surprised the two second years as they quickly turned around to face the upperclassman.  

“What are you doing here, Ennoshita-kun? Aren’t you going to practice?” 

It took a few seconds before the questioned male responded with a short ‘Ah!’ as he then turned around to his desk and pulled out from its compartment a personal belonging of his. “I came back for my notes, senpai.” 

“Oh…” Mama Crow then turned his direction at [Male Name] who had his eyes on the setter as well. “Daichi was right. You  _are_ here.” The third year entered the room and approached the shocked athlete. “Don’t worry. He didn’t exactly tell me about it. He just slipped.” 

“It’s practically the same thing, senpai,” [Male Name] deadpanned.  

“Why you…” Big pair of then then messed up (M/N)’s hair, much to the other’s chagrin. “S-Senpai! Cut that out!” 

“Oh yeah!” Araki blurted out of nowhere and asked the classmate. “Did you and Yuu meet on your way here, (M/N)?” The questioned only earned a surprised look from (M/N). 

“Guess not…” Araki returned to the sticks he was holding.  

“I saw Yuu at the school gates. He’s probably on his way home right now,” Ennoshita added, approaching the two other athletes. 

At the statement, [Male Name] just hang his head low in sadness.  _I was late. He already left,_  he thought to himself.  

“Cheer up!” A sudden slap on his back pulled [Male Name] out of his melancholy. “How about you come visit us back at the gym, [Male Name]-kun?” Koushi asked with a smile. “You can stay with Kiyoko-chan if you still can’t play.” 

“Uhm…” The teen slowly paced himself away from the others. “I guess I’ll just go, senpai. Naomi-san asked me to meet with her at her favourite café.” 

“Oh…” Sugawara felt dejected. “In that case, be safe on your way, okay?” 

“I-I will. Thanks, senpai.” The teen bowed politely at the upperclassman. “I’m off.” 

“Have a safe trip,” said the [Hair Colour]-haired teen’s classmates. After a few seconds, [Male Name]’s footsteps faded from Sugawara’s earshot.  

“He’s really attached with Nishinoya, isn’t he…” 

“That’s quite obvious, senpai.” Ennoshita responded. “Though Yuu is currently preoccupied with –Azumane-senpai that I heard he stopped visiting [Male Name] after our match with Dateko.” 

“We all were. It was only Daichi and Kiyoko-chan who got to see [Male Name] after the match.” 

“Do you think [Male Name] thinks negatively of us now because of that?” Ennoshita sounded worried.  

“I can’t say, to be honest. He’s too hard to read.”  

“Everyone in the class knows of his trust issues, Sugawara-senpai,” interrupted Niko while she was still playing with the others. “It’s most probably that he never trusted anyone of us in the first place, aside from Noya-san.” 

“And Kiyoko-senpai,” Ennoshita added. “[Male Name] acts differently with Kiyoko-senpai and Yuu than he does with us.” 

“Well, they’re cousins, after all,” Sugawara said to himself. “So you’re saying that he never felt anything about it to begin with, huh… Don’t you guys find it offensive though? That you think he doesn’t trust anyone of you here?” The Mama Crow was becoming worried of one of his baby crows.  

“We just try to understand him, senpai,” Araki responded. “It doesn’t affect with anyone of us here in the classroom, after all.” 

“He  _does_  try not to offend us or anything,” Suzaku added. “And Noya-san’s always there to back him up so there really no problem, to be honest.” 

“But still…” 

“Suga-senpai,” Ennoshita came out strong yet gentle. “There’s no point talking about it, I guess. Well, at least for now. We don’t know why he’s like that after all. Once we find more about it, then I suppose we can think of something.” 

“I guess you’re right. Thanks for the information, everyone.” The setter was referring to the second years playing King Game. “Let’s go to practice, Ennoshita-kun.” 

“You’re welcome, senpai.” 

Meanwhile, on his way to his destination, [Male Name] had his mind preoccupied about something. 

 _I guess I’ll visit_   _Yuu_ _on-the-spot once we arrive home after dinner_ _._   

* * *

  ** _Nishinoya’s_** ** _Point of View_**  

* * *

“Yuu! Dinner’s ready! Get down already!” 

 _Why can’t they just call me with less shouting?_  

Pulled away from my peaceful slumber courtesy of my screaming mother, I decided to head down the stairs before I can hear another round of her loud voice. 

“You heard? [Male Name]-kun finally got out of the hospital!” Mum said as she passed to my sibling the soy sauce. 

“A-Ah. Yeah, I did,” I lied.  

 _He didn’t tell me anything…_  

“It seems they’re eating outside tonight. You can visit them later once they’ve arrived next door.”  

“I-I guess I can do that later…” I said absentmindedly, my hand reaching for a cup of water.  

“What seems to be the matter, Yuu? You don’t seem excited. Are you and [Male Name]-kun fighting?” 

“W-What? N-No! We’re not! Where did you get that idea?” 

“I don’t know. You’re not as energetic as usual when it comes to [Male Name].”  _W-What is she talking about?_  

 _Why di_ _d_ _[Male Name]_ _kee_ _p it a secret from me that he’s out of the hospital already?_  

 _D-Did I do something wrong?_  

 _I don’t think I’ve done anything…_  

A few minutes after we finished our dinner and everyone in the Nishinoya household began to relax for the night, sounds of a steel gate being opened filled the air. It seemed our neighbours, the Mishimas, have just arrived. Peeking from my room window, I saw Mishima Naomi-san entering the house first, with Harumide-san following her from behind. Moving my eyes more to the left, I came to see a familiar figure locking the steel gates.  

**_[Male Name]_ _!_  **

On impulse, I immediately banged my window open and quickly screamed the name of my [Hair Colour]-haired neighbour. Though the distance was quite far, I noticed [Male Name] jerk up at the mention of his name. The guy then frantically turned everywhere, his eyes searching for me, before he replied happily.  

“Yuu!” 

“Fix yourself first before I come and see you!” 

Receiving a cheerful response, I then returned to my room and waited for a few minutes before jumping onto the balcony of his room. The gap between our two rooms were close enough that we both don’t bother entering each other’s houses through the main entrances. 

By the time I opened the balcony door his room, he was already wearing his usual [Favourite Colour] pyjamas. The moment his eyes landed on me, he immediately called out my name in a cheerful tone and opened his arms as if inviting me for a hug. 

Approaching his waiting figure, I simply decided to ruffle his hair which earned a pouting response, his face protruding resembling a duck’s bill. 

“Way to kill the moment, Yuu,” commented [Male Name] as he positioned his legs to cross-sit on one side of his bed. 

“I’m sulking at you, you know,” I feigned seriousness after retracting my hand, my arm now folded in front of me.  

“E-Eh?? W-Why?” His [Eye Colour] eyes darted at me.  

“Why didn’t you tell me that you were discharged already?” 

[Male Name] slowly turned to his left, avoiding my eyes. “I-I wanted to surprise you… Can’t I do that?” 

 _Surprise me, huh…_  

“So, that’s why,” The realisation then made me laugh a bit.  

 _He wanted to surprise me, did he?_  

 _Should have thought of that._  

“W-Why are you laughing, you short stuff!?”  

“For a second there,” I tried to contain the laughter. “I thought you were starting to hate me for some reason. What a conclusion I came up with.” 

[Male Name] just sat there on his bed, lips still puckered up in annoyance. “Can’t I do something for you sometimes?” 

 _There he is again…_  

“Come on,” I said as I quickly snapped my fingers on his nose. “Stop moping. You look like a child.” 

“Says the 17-year-old standing at 5’2”.” 

“5’2.7”, [Male Name]. 5’2.7”. Respect the number.” 

“Doesn’t make any difference really,” his lips curled to an obvious smirk. 

“Why you little…” 

Let’s just say we had a bit of fun after that. Since his hospitalization, we haven’t really hung out much, so we wasted the entire night playing some of the video games we both have with his multiplayer gaming console, either of us winning against each other every other match. 

* * *

 ** _Third Person Point of View_**  

* * *

It was almost the last day of classes.  

Luckily for Yuu, his grades were enough to spare him from repeating a grade. [Male Name], on the other hand, barely achieved his personal quota. But we still satisfied by it.  

After Yuu convinced him otherwise, that is. 

The two friends didn’t have any conversation related to the ace of their club. [Male Name] took the initiative to always divert the topic elsewhere every time the male felt it was going to an emotional land mine. Fortunately for him, his friend didn’t seem to take notice.  

When they were at school one day, [Male Name] had to go to the library and read some books. Weird enough, his libero friend accompanied him into the sanctuary of silence.  

Only for Yuu to groan out of boredom.  

“[Male Name],” Yuu whined, his upper body lying on the table, “Come on. Let's go to your place and play some games already. It’s almost dark.” The then-first year said in between stretching his arms across the table.  

The other male looked at his friend in slight amusement, a faint smile tucked on his lips. “I guess we better go, then.” 

Hearing music to his ears, Yuu instantly stood up, shouting a brief ‘Yes’ which earned him the glares of both the other male on the table and the librarian two tables across.  

“Though what did you drink that you joined me here, anyway?” [Male Name] asked in pure confusion while one hand slipped back onto a shelf the book he was reading. 

Playfully, Yuu arched his arm across [Male Name]’s shoulders and messed up the other’s hair using his other hand.  

“I haven’t visited you for months. I just want to catch up with you. Is that bad?” 

The other male turned away from Yuu, hiding his slightly warm cheeks from sight. “N-No, I don’t. Why’d that be?” 

“Oh, good! Come on, let’s go.” 

As the two exited the hall of books, two pairs of feet marched across the already scarcely populated hallway of the second floor. As both males walked down the stairs, one of them came to a halt.   

* * *

 ** _Mishima’s_** ** _Point of View_**  

* * *

Ever since I came back, I have already seen my upperclassmen in the club. In fact, the next school day after the exam, I visited them in the gym while they were having their practice sessions.  

So, that also meant I have not seen Azumane -senpai. 

Ever since.  

Until that day when I saw him a few feet away from me and Noya.  

That was one of the last things I wanted to happen that day.  

Before I knew it, from a few steps up the stairs, Noya plunged into the floor and jumped a bullet punch towards the unexpecting Azumane-senpai. Caught off-guard, of course, Senpai lost his footing and fell hard on the floor. With Noya quickly over his lying figure, two hands grabbed a hold on Azumane-senpai's collar. 

I didn’t want to further witness what was in front of, Noya shouting words at the frightened upperclassman, so I intervened.  

“You’re still not back in the club? How much of a coward are you?” Noya was red with rage, violently shaking the paling Azumane-senpai every other second.  

I tried to pull Noya by an arm, but his grip on the collar was tight. Other passers-by stopped on their tracks and started to form a crowd near us. That only made me more tensed and continued to forcefully separate the two fighting high schoolers. I tried to pull Noya by his other arm, but with one strong push of his shoulder and elbow, I lost my grip and I, too, fell on the floor in an uncomfortable fashion.  

* * *

 ** _Third Person Point of View_**  

* * *

She was walking side-by-side with a classmate when Shimizu Kiyoko and her attention was attracted by a horde of gathering schoolmates.  

Paying no mind to it, the manager of the Men’s Volleyball Club almost flipped her hair and turned around when a familiar voice reached her ears.  

“You’re still not back in the club? How much of a coward are you?” 

 _Noya-san?_  

After sticking one piece of the puzzle to another, the then-second year left her classmates and made her way through the crowd, excusing herself as she proceeded with caution. The moment she passed through the human barricade, her motherly instincts immediately stepped in.  

She quickly asked several men behind her to pull away Noya while rushing towards her cousin. [Male Name] was sitting on one of his foot, the other leg stretched out and limp.  

When Noya was successfully pulled back, the short male was still struggling, using brute strength to release himself from his restrains while his mouth turned into a machine gun of words. Asahi, on the other hand, was completely lost for words, his dilated eyes completely proof of his emotions. Some nearby classmates offered their hands at the harassed teen.  

As for Kiyoko herself, she was focusing more on her cousin. Though she already asked whether her cousin was fine or not, her gut feeling was more powerful in telling that [Male Name] was unwell, even after the male himself denied it.  

A teacher soon after arrived and dispersed the curious crowd. After receiving a stink eye from the faculty member, the previously agitated Noya slowly calmed down, his head still fuming with rage, however. He was then escorted to a separate location for the teacher to talk with him. On the one hand, Asahi got the strength to walk towards the clinic with several classmates surrounding him, a held handkerchief over a bruise he earned.  

Meanwhile, with help from some schoolmates, Kiyoko acted as a walking cane and assisted her cousin to the clinic as well once [Male Name] gave in after several refusals.  

In the clinic, since the nurse was out that time though still somewhere within the school grounds, Kiyoko took it upon herself to look after the minor bruises his classmate received. Meanwhile, her cousin was lying sideways on a nearby bed, facing a plain, white wall.  

“Ts-Ouch,” Asahi grunted in pain, a ball of brown cotton being dabbed onto his small wound by Kiyoko.  

“Don’t be such a baby. Come on, turn your head,” responded Kiyoko monotonously. “Please tell me how these things happened.” 

“Noya-san just jumped at me while I was on my way to the Faculty Room. He started yelling and shaking me that I couldn’t respond,” Asahi twitched in pain afterwards after a new, brown cotton ball was applied near his left cheek. Kiyoko simply replied a sigh.  

After being assisted, Asahi approached the resting underclassman, but as he walked to face [Male Name], he saw two closed eyes and heard incoherent mumbling. Not wanting to disturb the slumbering teen, Asahi slowly and carefully excused himself out of the clinic.  

The bespectacled beauty tidied the used-up medical supplies, approached a nearby trash bin, and cleared his throat.  

“You’re lucky Azumane-san doesn’t know your usual tell,” Kiyoko paced to face her cousin who slowly opened his eyes, his expression monotonous.  

“I’m too tired to talk to people.” 

“You’re always tired if it’s not me, Noya-san, or your parents.” 

“Irrelevant,” the male tried to sit straight but felt a twinge of pain as his legs dragged across the bed. It was not unnoticed by the other person in the room.  

“Are you sure your legs are fine? I’ll call your parents to pick you up,” Kiyoko looked at her cousin from head to toe and back to the legs.  

“N-No need,” [Male Name] flailed his hands in panic, “I’ll just take a taxi home. No need for them to be disturbed at work.” 

“I can walk with you if you want. I’ll just talk to Coach first.” 

“If it’s not a bother.” 

[Male Name] and Kiyoko sluggishly paced themselves towards the gate. The male already had his things with him, but the other person didn’t; Kiyoko left hers in the club room locker. Leaving her cousin for a while, Kiyoko turned back to the gym.  Who came to see [Male Name] in a few minutes was someone else. 


	4. Chapter 4

* * *

**_Present Time –_** ** _Sometime_ ** **_during the Last Quarter of the Year_ **

**_Third Person Point of View_**  

* * *

“Man, that training just now was intense!” Hinata blurted out inside the locker room. 

“Right? I thought my arms would fall off.” Ryuunosuke answered while taking off his shirt, applying pressure on his shoulder in the process. 

“And to think Coach Ukai said that this is just the beginning,” Noya remarked as he opened his own locker. 

Inside it were what you’d expect belonging to a sports club member – a school bag, several unkempt clothes, a water bottle, and some antiperspirant sprays. Though, amidst the pile of materials – which should  _really_  be cleaned up and organised, was a neatly wrapped and folded black jersey shirt. Noticing the sportswear, Noya pulled it out of his locker and turned it over, revealing a number 4 written in white ink. 

“Ah, Nishinoya-senpai. You have two jersey shirts?” Hinata appeared behind the libero’s locker door which made Yuu flinch slightly.  

At that point on, the male libero cringed at himself.  

* * *

 **_A few months before – Somewhere in the First Quarter of the Year_ ** ****

* * *

“[M-Male Name],” said Noya, evidently calmer than previously. “You know, I’m... I’m sorry about what happened earlier.”  

After starting the mess that he made, Noya was called into the Faculty Room and was given a thorough speech by both his Homeroom teacher and the one who stopped the fight. 

Wanting to confirm his friend’s condition, the libero then scanned [Male Name] until he landed on a recently damaged area. “Y-Your leg!” 

Noya quickly knelt to feel the limb of his neighbour, one hand gently raising the opening of one pant leg. Soon after, reddening skin welcomed Noya whose face went from calm to distraught. 

“[M-Male Name]! I-I'm sorry! I-” 

Without a second thought but with a frightened expression on his face, [Male Name] descended to slap the other’s hand away. 

“D-Don’t mind that. No need to worry about me.” 

“No need? Your legs are still healing,” remarked the worried libero. “Come on. I’ll walk you home.” 

“I said I can handle this myself. No need to fret over it. It’ll go away eventually.” 

“And if it doesn’t eh? You will be spending months in the hospital again! And again, because of me!” Noya didn’t think twice before fishing out something from his pants.  

“I’ll call your parents–” 

Before Noya can press a button, his mobile device quickly flew off his own hands, crashing on the concrete walkway a few metres away. The owner felt surprised, but his friend beat him to it.  

“I said no need to do something about it! I’ll take care of this myself!” 

“What the hell are you saying? [Male Name]! You’re completely not well! Just shut up and let me help you.” 

“I’m feeling fine, damn it! I don’t need your help! I don’t need anybody’s help! I can handle myself just fine!” 

Emotions swirled inside [Male Name], eager to come out. The male himself already did, so there was more to come. Noya, on the other hand, didn’t expect the sudden outburst. He stood unmoved, but obviously disconcerted.  

“Ever since the beginning, it has always been myself, myself, myself! No one was there for me, no one spared time for me. Well, you know what? I can survive without anyone around me. In fact, I don’t need all of you! You can all go back to your shit of a life, get crazy with whatever fuck you are dealing with, and just leave me alone!” 

And [Male Name] dragged his legs away from the gates, leaving his friend speechless and blown. He never blew off like that, especially not in front of his best friend. But, what he witnessed back then simply made him understand everything. In the end, he will just be tossed aside by everyone he cares about. Maybe not now, but someday.  

He already experienced all of it when he was taken and returned back at the orphanage. He shouldn’t have been complacent just because he met people who didn’t show  _those_ signs at first.  

They are all the same.  

Losing the motivation to wait for his cousin, he walked limply to the nearby bus stop, planning to reach the stop two blocks near his home.   

On the other hand, Noya himself slowly gained his thought.   

* * *

 **_Nishinoya’s_ ** **_Point of View_ **

* * *

_H-He never yelled like that before._  

 _W-What was his problem?_  

 _All I wanted to do was help him._  

I still couldn’t believe what just happened. Sure [Male Name] and I had fights in the past, but never did he sound so aggressive. In addition, it wasn’t new that he felt alienated but, again, never did he feel so strongly about it before.  

While trying to piece together the puzzle, I dropped to pick up my tossed device. Checking if it was still working, I continued to lose myself in thought.  

 _It was obvious that he needed help._  

 _I guess I’ll just contact his parents first. And then I will check up on him later._  

 _B-But..._  

 _What would I say?_  

 _How did he get that swelling?_  

 _I don’t even know where it– Don’t tell me..._  

 _It was from..._  

Out of the blue, an angelic voice reached out to me. Turning my head towards the source, I saw a panting Kiyoko-san.  

 _Oooh_ _._  

 _Kiyoko-san..._  

 _Even when you’re out of breath, you still are perfect._  

“Have you seen [Male Name]? I told him to wait for me here,” my angel stopped in front of me, trying to gather information. Myself, on the other hand, was lost in Heaven. 

For a few seconds.  

“[M-Male Name]?” I was mumbling out of context at first. “A-Ah, yes! I did. But he left already.” 

“What?” My goddess was hurt. “I told him to wait here. He can’t even walk straight. Why didn’t you stop him, Noya-san?” 

“He wanted to be alone. He didn’t want my help after I offered, so I let him.” 

“But he can’t walk home all by himself in that condition! I’ll go look for him.” 

And Kiyoko-san left in a panic. I don’t know if she headed to where [Male Name] was heading, but I sure know I don’t want to leave her doing it alone.  

She was right.  

Why did I not make [Male Name] stay even after what he said? He was clearly in no condition to walk home all by himself.  

 _What kind of a friend am I to neglect [Male Name]?_  

Gathering my strength and whatever I needed that time, I joined our manager in looking for my neighbour.  

We spent all night looking for him. We went to bus stops, one after the other. We even headed to [Male Name]’s house to check if he has already arrived, but to no avail. Soon after, Kiyoko-san had to contact her aunt to check up on her cousin, but they, too, didn’t get anything. In the end, they, too, had to search for their own son. I asked my own folks to help in the search and I was glad they were willing. 

I was busy trying to call [Male Name]’s own number when I received a phone call from my mum who stayed at home in case someone would arrive next door. I immediately asked if [Male Name] already arrived at their house, but my mum’s voice was louder than mine.  

Her scream drained my own voice.  

“Yuu! There was an accident at the children's park! Go check it out!” 

Not wasting any second, I speeded towards the location with my phone still on my ear. There was only one children’s park near our area, so going there was not a problem for me. On the other hand, my mum kept saying that she immediately felt bad when she heard the news, but I forced her to not jinx anything. Luckily enough, I was able to decently send a message to Kiyoko-san and Mishima Naomi-san about what my mother called about amidst rushing to the area like there’s no tomorrow. 

On the way, [Male Name]’s mum crossed paths with me and took me with her using her car. The moment we arrived at the scene, there was already a crowd. Several policemen were maintaining the curious audience while behind the yellow line was an ambulance.  

Like my mum, I was starting to feel the worst. So, I squeezed myself through the human blockade, quickly dodging and charging towards the front, until I got to pass through one man in uniform.  

Before I could proceed, however, another policeman caught me by the wrist and tried to escort me out of the area. I tried to struggle my way out of his tight grip, squirming my hand away from him, but he held strong.  

It was when I was still tossing and turning when one emergency responder was lowering down on a nearby snow-white cloth laid down on the street something.  

More like  _someone_. 

Truth be told, the moment I heard the sirens of the ambulance, how I wished [Male Name] wasn’t involved in the accident. Or at the very least, he was sitting somewhere near or inside the hospital vehicle with someone attending to any possible bruise he got.  

But never did I want to see him... 

To be laid down on a white cloth, with red all over his clothes and his head. 

At that moment, as if my inner strength finally erupted, I was able to release myself from the policeman’s grasp and rushed towards the nearby responder. Not expecting someone to appear behind him, the dumbfounded medic dropped on the floor like a heavy bag as I quickly faced the lying person on the now soiled blanket.  

The view was the most horrid one I saw in my entire life.  

And just like how my strength came, it left in a snap. My knees unbuckled, my hands trembled, and my eyes started to water. Knees touched the concrete road while voices roamed in my head.  

‘This can’t be possible.’ 

‘This must be a dream.’ 

‘Someone tell me this has to be a dream.’ 

But, sadly, it wasn’t. 

The uniform that looked like mine, torn in certain places. The hands which I used to hold, stained with red. The eyes which I wanted to see, completely shut.  

It was [Male Name]. And dead. In front of me.  

* * *

  ** _Third Person Point of View_ **

* * *

Mishima Naomi later approached the kneeling teen, crestfallen the moment she saw what’s up close. Her own son, her beloved son, was covered with blood which may be his or not. She immediately knelt in front of [Male Name], taking her son’s lifeless body in her arms, and held it tight as tears burst on scene. Her shrieks of sorrow and sadness echoed the area, paining both the medic and the policeman from trying to separate her and her loved one.  

Noya beside her didn’t fare any different. He was also screaming from his heart as his own eyes shed tears non-stop. The male tried to shake his friend, yell at him, and even threaten him if he didn’t wake up. But reality kicked in soon after and he rested his head on the lifeless corpse’s hands.  

In turned out that [Male Name] didn’t take a bus as planned. To put it more accurately, he wasn’t able to. Before he was able to ride a bus, the male passed by a convenient store and bought some items. The moment he got out, the bus already left. Hence, the male ought to walk all the way home, despite his bad legs. He didn’t want anyone to find him, so he took a long way home, turning at a corner after corner instead of walking straight ahead. By the time he arrived at the intersection, one runaway vehicle rushed down the road, plowing everything and everyone within range, and smashed into the children’s park, right in front of a now damaged penguin-shaped, playground slide in the middle of the park.  

In the end, four people were hurt, two of which were badly injured. Three people lost their lives, the apparently intoxicated driver of the runaway truck, a salaryman who was walking home, and [Male Name]. On the scene, plastic bag from a local convenient store was later found and it contained two packs of melted ice pops. That bag belonged to [Male Name].  

During the wake, the Mishimas, Shimizus, and the Nishinoyas frequently met, Kiyoko and Noya always near the coffin of [Male Name].  Both teens tried to be strong, but Kiyoko gazed at the eternally slumbering cousin more than Noya who, on the other hand, frequently burst into tears the moment his eyes laid onto his friend’s lifeless body.  

The other members of the Volleyball Club visited as well along with some classmates, schoolmates, and teachers. Representatives from the orphanage came in to express their condolence. It was a simple wake. And on the day of the cremation, litres of tears flowed for one last time, but it was Naomi, Harumide, Noya, and even Kiyoko who grieved the most. 

To Noya, he pinned all the blame on himself.  

If he was more attentive, if he was just more caring, more aware, if he only paid a lot more attention. 

His best friend shouldn’t have left him early.  

The wide, gaping hole his friend left felt hell for the libero.  

* * *

**_Back to the Present Time_ **

* * *

Yuu felt disgusted about himself. But his underclassman was waiting for a reply.  

“A-ah, yeah. I do...” He trailed off, staring down at the black fabric. On his face, a soft, sad smile was forming, away from the #10’s sight. 

“So you  _did_  ask Kiyoko-san to prepare another one.” a tall second year spoke, earning the two short players’ attention. 

“Of course.” That’s all Noya replied. 

“Noya-san,” Ryuunosuke sounded serious. All of a sudden, the room temperature dropped. Chikara and Kazuhito took notice of this, while Hinata... 

Let’s just say he was being himself. 

“I’m not being inconsiderate, but shouldn’t you move on already? It’s almost the end of the year.” 

“Move on?” Noya said hysterically. “Easy for you to say. You weren’t the one who let him die!” At that point, Noya had screamed, startling everyone, but Ryuunosuke blew a fuse instead. 

“We were depressed and sad when it happened. You’re not the only one. But shouldn’t you move on already? You can’t keep on living in the past, Noya-san! It’s unhealthy!” 

“Move on? You’re asking me to forget about him, aren’t you? LIKE HELL I’D DO THAT!” A loud thud from the metallic lockers then rocked in the area. 

“Stop with this nonsense!” In a fit of rage, Ryuunosuke stormed his batch mate and clenched the teammate’s collar, both now glaring daggers at one another. The taller male was red with anger for the other while the libero...  

Was swallowed with regrets and sorrow.  

On the background, Hinata was panicking, frantically shifting left and right to ask for suggestions. The two other second years started to run towards Yuu and Ryuunosuke until the seemingly bald athlete started to speak. 

“Do you really think [Male Name] would be happy if you keep doing this to yourself?! If he sees you’re still grieving and feeling shit, would you really think it would make him feel better?” 

Nishinoya then shifted his head to the left, avoiding the wing spiker’s glare. This, however, did not deter Tanaka and continued. 

“If [Male Name] would be here, seeing you hurting yourself, I’m sure he’d immediately scold you, make you kneel in front of him and explain to him the problem, and even laugh that you’re worrying over nothing.” Tanaka’s voice slowly lowered as he spoke. 

“But he’s not here now, is he?” 

Yuu returned his eyes to the teammate. With a scowl on his face, he continued. 

“Because of me, because I was too focused on Asahi-san, that he... he...” 

With a slight push, the taller male forcefully released the shorter one. Yuu then hang his head low as he started crying a long river of tears, tightly holding the folded shirt on his left hand.  

“If I just didn’t let [Male Name] go at that time, he wouldn’t have run away! If I wasn’t too focused on Asahi-san, I would have been there beside him, helping him in his rehabilitation, helping him in his studies, and seeing to it that he really felt no one was leaving him behind again. If I wasn’t too much of an idiot, he wouldn’t have walked off and got himself involved in that accident.” 

Eyes pained at the usually hyper libero, some clung on their shoulders in hurt.  

“If I just continued on visiting him instead on focusing my attention on Asahi-san, h-he’d still be here with us, playing, laughing, eating with us...” 

Unbeknownst to anyone, a bespectacled raven beauty entered the locker room and slowly wrapped her arms around the shaking libero. With her head looking down at Yuu, Shimizu started comforting him. 

“Nishinoya-san, [Male Name] wouldn’t be happy with what you’re doing with yourself. Naomi-obaa-san already told you. You’re not in the wrong here. You didn’t want him nor anyone else involved in that crash to actually be there. Don’t carry all the burden.” 

“Shi-Shimizu-san,” Noya tried to glance at the female hugging him, his watery eyes clouding his sight. 

“You’re not the only who misses [Male Name]. We all do. There’s no one around anymore to constantly yell at you or Tanaka-san for your antics, no one to help me talk to the teachers about practices and your grades, no one to accompany me to... to...” 

Not handling it any longer, even the black-haired Shimizu herself started breaking down. Her soft whimpering caught Noya’s and the others’ attentions, shocking them all. They, well except the ginger head, knew how close Shimizu was to [Male Name], but did not expect the normally emotionally strong manager to let her tears flow freely again. Like on that day.  

“[M-Male Name] would really be sad it he was to find out that we froze our time and continued on living without care for our own well-being. It’ll be more burden on his part. Let us not do that to him, okay?” 

Noya directed his teary eyes to the taller female cousin of the deceased [Male Name]. For  _the_ Shimizu Kiyoko to have cried like this again, with other people in the area, she must have also been greatly affected by her cousin’s untimely death a few months back. 

“Let us not waste [Male Name]’s effort, okay?” The messed-up manager softly asked the smaller libero, one hand cupping the other’s cheek. 

“I don’t want to forget him. It’s because I did that he died in the first place. If I do that now, he’ll be forgotten for good.” 

“It’s not a matter of forgetting. It’s about accepting reality. I hate it that [Male Name] left us. It felt horrible when I arrived at the scene, to see him on the floor, but him not responding to me. It still does. I know you know how disturbed we were. But, if we do not embrace what has happened, it will be us suffering in the end.  And we of all people know that [Male Name] wouldn’t like that. It would worry him, sadden him, and even make him cry. If he was still here, do you want to do that to him?” 

Noya shook his head sluggishly, still whimpering in tears.  

“Again. I know it’s hard, but it will be what he would want if we accept what happened and move on. Let time heal our wounds, not carve more to our souls. It’s what he would want.” 

As if on cue, Noya started bawling once more. Cries echoed within the walls, but, unlike before, it felt different.  

To Noya, he didn’t want his friend to die. No one did. But all this time, he carried all the blame, the guilt, on his shoulders and let it burden him. As a friend of [Male Name], as one of the very few people the teen with [Hair Colour] locks opened up to, he finally accepted. 

That if he doesn’t want to upset his friend, wherever he may be right now, he should remain positive. And not let anyone hinder him in his path.  

As they say,  _Yuu_ _Ou_ _Mai Shin [_ _勇往邁進_ _]_. To fearlessly move forward.  

 _If that’s what [Male Name] wants, he should get it._  

After clearing his sinuses, he used his right arm to wipe away the tears. Gaining a bit of strength back, the libero took a deep breath. 

“Okay!” He clenched his palms into fists, energy starting to consume him. “Thank you so much, Kiyoko-san!” In a quick manner, the libero bowed to the female manager. Wiping her face clean with a hanky, a soft, bright smile graced her face. 

“You’re welcome, Nishinoya-san!” 

“Well then,” From the outside, the ashen-haired Mama Crow entered, his Papa counterpart right behind him. “How about we visit [Male Name] today? We haven’t done that yet this school year, after all.” 

In the background, an orange-haired ball of sunshine wondered if he could come, knowing he didn’t know the guy. His worries immediately dispersed when a shorter upperclassman, with a smile on his face, put weight on the decoy’s shoulders. From the older player’s hands, a wrapped jersey still hung. 

“Don’t worry. [Male Name] would love it. You may not know, but that guy actually wanted to make friends. Tons of them. It’s just that he had some trust issues.” 

“Not to mention the shyness.” Kiyoko added while walking herself out. “Don’t forget the shyness.” 

“Come on! I want you to meet the most awkward yet very comfortable [Hair Colour]-coloured goofball I ever met. The mini Suga-senpai of the club, Mishima [Male Name].  

* * *

**_Extended Ending_ **

* * *

“But why the #4 though?” Hinata asked his upperclassmen inside a bus they rode. 

He sat at the back of the spacious bus, the others were a seat or two away. 

“[Male Name] was supposedly the #4, considering he was the first one in his batch to file his application form when they were first years,” answered the raven-haired captain on his right, his arms folded on his chest. 

“Ah, so the numbering is based on how early you pass your form, huh.”  

“Well, that, and...” Chikara added. He sat in front of the junior. “[Male Name] loved the number so much, he insisted that someday, he must be #4.” 

“Love? #4? Why?” 

“No one knows.” Yuu answered, his head resting on his arms acting like a pillow. He sat at the left of his underclassman. “He never told us. He said he’d bring it to his grave if he had to.” 

 _Of course, he won’t tell anyone._ Kiyoko said to herself while staring at the scenery across the window. 

 _He told me it’s something special._  

 _...._  

 _It_ _was w_ _hen he met you,_ _Nishinoya_ _-san._  

 _On the 4_ _th_ _of April, on the same park where he died._  

 _You shared your ice pops with him when he was crying all by himself._  

 _Hmm..._  

 _‘Till the end, you really hid_ it _from him, huh..._  

 


	5. Special End: Yuu Ou Mai Shin

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> This is a special ending of the entire story. 
> 
> Unfolding years after the incident, Noya is living the life he has left. This time, not forgetting that one neighbour he had that loved him all his life without the libero knowing.

 

It was glorious.

Spectacular.

Awe-inspiring.

Because of a short man with great skills, the peak of success was reached, was landed on, was held. Because of Nishinoya Yuu, he and his comrades survived the jungle full of conniving foxes, powerful bears, and mischievous snakes.

The jungle known as the Olympics.

After basking in the limelight, the flashes of cameras, the interviews of media, and the fight against exposing discomfort, the Karasuno graduate found himself driving a car down the roads of Miyagi. Turning the wheels like a pro, he headed to a destination forever etched into his mind.

Twenty minutes passed and an orange vehicle came to a halt in a parking space beneath a mountain. Noya then left the car not before heading to the passenger seat and grabbing the bouquet he personally ordered from a fellow athlete who runs a flower shop. Despite the package being over-the-top, he handled it quite well, save for a few minor missteps up the stone steps along the mountain.

When he reached an open area, a wooden red Torii gate towered over the athlete, signaling him that he was almost there. A few careful steps followed soon after and when he reached a particular stone monument, his own two feet stopped. His body turned a sharp 90 degrees to the right.

He was now standing in front of his destination: the stone grave of his childhood friend, Mishima [Male Name].

The male glanced from beside the big bouquet he held, a faint smile present on his face.

"Nice to see you again, [Male Name]."

After their kamikaze of a visit to his friend on the day his tear gates came crashing down, he promised to visit the grave once in a while. To be more accurate, before and after something big happens to the libero. His last visit was two days before his flight to the tournament in a resolve to calm down his washed-up nerves.

It's been at least a week since then.

He first placed the set of flowers down before grabbing available grave-cleaning tools. He first filled a bucket full of water and, with his sleeves and pants rolled up, he commenced.

Cleaning wasn't really a bore nor was it a tedious chore for him since it hasn't become too dirty since his last visit. Once he was satisfied with his hard labour, he emptied the bucket, put the things back where they belonged, and decorated the freshly-cleaned stone marker with his purchased flowers.

He placed himself facing the grave, sat in seiza, and clapped his hands before he began to pray.

"You know, it's almost eight years since you left, with the anniversary being around the corner and all," the man spoke softly, completely different from his usual cheerful disposition, once the prayers were finished.

"If it wasn't for Kiyoko-san, I may still have second thoughts about visiting you here."

"B-But, that's not it anymore. You know that right?" A nervous laughter then escaped the man's lips. "And you've heard of this story several times already, you must be rolling your eyes by now."

A hand reached for the back of the libero's neck, rubbing it slowly in sheer embarrassment.

"Well, [Male Name]. I'll be back in a few days. And this time, I will really be able to come here. No need to show yourself during one of my games like last time. Although, it would be nice if you could watch. Anyway, see ya, [Male Name]."

And with a soft bow, Noya headed back to his car, fully confident that he can return to the area after some time.

As his car came in sight, another vehicle was about to park near his. And with a close glance, it sparked an inkling of familiarity within Noya. As soon as a woman emerged from the vehicle, there and then, it clicked.

"Mishima-san. Nice to see you again." It was his friend's foster mother, Mishima Naomi.

A certain face then glowed in recognition before a faint grin ran across it. Beside the woman in her mid 50s, another lady appeared. A much younger one. And this person also had Noya's attention.

"Ki-Kiyoko-san!"

"Oh, hello, Noya-san."

A pair of grey orbs then trailed themselves onto the shirt and pants the person walking towards her and her aunt had.

"It seemed you still got ahead of us and cleaned [Male Name]'s grave, huh."

"I don't like to brag, but, it just doesn't seem right for me if I visit him without cleaning the marker."

"I appreciate the thought, I really do," Naomi expressed. " But, you don't need to go out of your way, Yuu-kun. We could have done that."

The male quickly waved his hands. "It's not a bother at all, Mishima-san. I'm doing this with my own free will. No need to be worried."

"Okay, then," smiled the older lady. "But, your mother's been telling me that you haven't been visiting her lately. Have dinner with us later. Tonight, we're all eating in our house since it's shabu-shabu night. Even Kiyoko-chan will be coming."

Slanted, brown eyes then glanced at the younger woman.

"I have free time and Naomi-obaa-san invited me."

"Well, Yuu-kun? Will you join us?"

"I guess I can go. It's been a while since I had shabu-shabu with you and my folks, after all."

The two women then beamed.

"That's settled, then. I'll contact your mum later. See you at 7, Yuu-kun." And the two women headed off.

Later that day, Noya came true to his word and enjoyed dinner along with his old neighbours, his family, and his former upperclassman. Laughter and smiles were here and there. Even the normally stoic blessed the dining table with hearty chuckles from time to time.

The night was dark but full of pleasure.

Since it was almost 10 when the once-in-a-blue-moon bonding experience ended, Noya ended up sleeping in his old room. After having breakfast with the other Nishinoyas, he bid them farewell and drove back to Tokyo.

Not before returning to [Male Name]'s grave for his last few words.

It was a simple storytelling of what happened hours prior coupled with a heart-felt goodbye. The athlete didn't take an hour in the cemetery. However, when he returned to his orange vehicle, he was met with an unexpected welcoming committee.

Although it was just one feeble black cat sitting on the bonnet of his car, its tail swinging lazily.

"Hey there, little fella," Noya cooed as he wrapped his hands around the young animal's waist and lifted it to his eye level. "What are you doing here on my car?"

As he was talking to a kitten, the quadrupedal mammal simply meowed in response, slightly giving the male in his mid 20's a faint sense of satisfaction. He purred along with the feline, pressing his nose against the fluffy ball of cuteness.

Upon closer inspection, the kitten's peculiar eyes trapped the libero in a trance. The shade of sunset in the left paired with a reflection of the skies in the right gave the man an eerie sense of curiosity, tilting his head in thought.

"What an interesting eye colour you have, neko-chan." And the kitten meowed with a happy tone, as if grateful to the compliment it heard.

"Tell you what. I just can't leave you here since I think you're all alone," uttered the athlete as his eyes scouted the vicinity. Indeed, it looked like the kitten was all on its own.

"So, how about I bring you back with me to Tokyo? Would you like that? It is a bit boring with me all alone in my condominium, after all."

And the kitten meowed non-stop while rubbing its head on the male's wrists. Noya simply thought of it as the mammal's simple way of thanking him for adopting it.

"Okay. That's settled, then," Noya proudly declared with a huff as he slowly headed for the passenger's side of the vehicle.

As he slowly opened the door with one hand, he also gently lowered the young fluff onto the chair. As heterochromatic orbs stared at the libero, a smile of satisfaction slowly appeared on Noya.

"I'll give you a name once we arrive at Tokyo. Of course, we'll buy you some cat food and other stuff along the way as well, so you better expect being spoiled, you cute, little neko-chan."

Starting then, as Noya did express, his days alone in Tokyo brightened. Focusing more on volleyball, Hikaru the kitten, and his family back at Miyagi, Noya continued to fire his passion at saving balls and raking in points for his team.

For him, winter was yet to come.

* * *

"It's been a while, Tamako-san."

"Oh, [Male Name]. Indeed, it has been."

Once someone or something dies and is willing to pass on, they enter a world not part of their old one - the Afterlife. A world full of numerous magical creatures, it also housed an object of high significance. The mechanism responsible for the return of dead souls into the living world - the Wheel of Reincarnation.

At that moment, [Male Name] found himself walking in the streets of the shopping district of the Afterlife, the busiest district within short distance from the Wheel. As he was about to march back to the red circular mechanism in the sky, a certain Death God eating dumplings in a nearby food stand caught his eye.

"You'll be reincarnated again? It hasn't been months since the last one."

"Well, unlike your husband, Tamako-san, although I was also reincarnated as a fish, I was easily hunted and served on a hot plate."

"That's too bad. And here I thought your life before this old one was the quickest."

"Although, I was very lucky that that life also ended within short notice. I mean, being peed on by dogs, cats, and humans is not someone wants to add on their resume. I've seen a lot." And the young male crouched himself, shaking as horrid thoughts from his previous life as a plant flashed in his mind.

"But again, it's very weird that you recall your past lives. Not a lot of souls can do that. Not only that. Every time you come back here, you are in your human form, not in the other forms you had. You must be a special one."

"If I _am_ special, how come I couldn't remember my life before being the human named [Male Name]?"

"How come, indeed?"

As the grandmother placed her now empty plate on the counter beside her, he straightened her kimono and faced the male.

"Shall I assist you to the Wheel?"

"It could make the short walk more entertaining. If you don't mind that is."

"Of course, I don't."

And the two headed to the direction of the wheel, to where the other souls who have passed on queued before riding the escalator into the Wheel, the two continued to converse.

"I wonder what kind of creature I will be reincarnated into this time?"

"We Death Gods don't normally know that, but if we do, we can't really tell you."

"I know that. I just wish I wouldn't be someone or something being taken for granted again. Experiencing the life of a castaway is harrowing enough."

The old lady beside him simply grinned. "Don't you worry. I'm sure you'd experience happiness yourself. If you won't in this life, maybe in the next one. You know the procedures already, anyway."

"Well, I can't deny that."

After a few minutes, the two arrived at the end of a queue. Old ladies, middle-aged men in suits, and some teenagers were standing in front of them.

It was the queue for the Wheel of Reincarnation.

"Well then, I guess this is it, [Male Name]."

"Thanks for the company, Tamako-san. Say my regards to Rokudou-kun and Mamiya-san, is that okay?"

"Sure thing." And the woman began walking back to where she came from. Not before stopping a few steps away from his old companion and declared a thought.

"Enjoy your next life. You will surely like it. I hope you make the most of it. It may not be your last, but make it your best."

"I will."

A few souls later, it was [Male Name]'s turn to step into the red wheel in the sky.

_I wonder what new life I will be having now._

...

 _"Meow"_.


End file.
